Thursday, August 14, 2014

Indycar Drinking Game

First off, I'll start by saying I don't condone the idea of drinking large sums of alcohol at a time. This article, which is meant for two reasons: 1) Humor 2) To point out things that happen in great occurrence or that are really rare in Indycar, and thus you should always make sure to please drink responsibly and never drive a vehicle whilst under the influence.

Having said that, I hope you get a laugh out of the list I've compiled here. Enjoy!

  • If Scott Dixon says the word 'fantastic,' take a drink
  • If Juan Pablo Montoya and 'side-horn' or 'chrome-horn' get put in the same sentence, take a drink
  • If AJ Foyt swears, take a drink
  • If Charlie Kimball gets identified as having diabetes during the broadcast, take a drink
  • If Townsend Bell either refers to his driving experience or his desire for Indycars to have more horsepower, take a drink
  • If Tony Kanaan passes three or more cars on a start/restart, take a drink
  • If Sebastian Saavedra suffers a mechanical failure, take a drink
  • If Carlos Munoz finishes in the same place that he started, take a drink
  • If  Graham or Bobby Rahal says the words 'grip' or 'babe' on the radio, take a drink
  • If Will Power gets a penalty or causes an accident, take a drink
  • If there's an Indycar fan bitching on Twitter, take a dri.... Actually the world does not have enough alcohol for that
  • If Ed Carpenter whines about something, take a drink
  • If Mike Hull goes on a strategical rant, take a drink
  • If Ryan Hunter-Reay gets mentioned as the reigning Indy 500 winner, take a drink
  • If someone refers to James Hinchcliffe as the Mayor of Hinchtown, take a drink
  • If Takuma Sato DNFs, take a drink
  • If Leigh Diffey adds an "r" to a word that ends in a vowel, take a drink
  • If Helio Castroneves referred to through a dancing metaphor, take a drink
  • If Helio Castroneves says 'helluva job', take a drink
  • If Mikhail Aleshin wins a race, finish your drink
  • If Marco Andretti smiles, finish your drink

Please drink responsibly!!

-Matthew Hickey

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